So the quote is "If you fall off a horse, you climb right back on." When a ice skater trips after attempting a triple sow cow and falls to the ice, they get right back up...and picks up where they left off.
A break-up or the end of dates with a guy can hurt like the burning of a curling iron. At first, the pain can be really intense. It doesn't really go away without some sort of treatment. When it happened for me, I let myself have a good cry. I cried on the way home from my work out. I cried once I got home. I thought that crying was the so called protocol for something like this. I let myself have 2-3 days to wallow and relive the moments we had. Then I dried my eyes and took control of the situation. I somehow felt empowered with the fact I made the choice to take my life back and have "me" time. Instead of dwelling on what could have been.
Since this blog is about my dating obstacles, and adventures, and being honest with those obstacles, it's been a bit awkward. Awkward entering the dating scene, and sometimes uncomfortable. The whole idea of dating can be daunting to say the least. The first time out of the gate is never really pretty. It may start out strong and exciting and all. I know I was giddy and excited each time I had a "first date." Then reality sets in and it becomes exhausting. Sleep is lost, games are played with the mind, etc. When this happens, first thing expected to do is throw in the towel. I know....I've said it way too many times. I told myself, "I was fine before all this mess. I was doing fine before this dating nonsense."
I thought about taking a break and taking a "man-cation" or hiatus from dating. I felt like I was getting burnt out and doubting my own awesomeness, so the best thing to do was eliminate dating. Take time and take care of me. Resolve some personal issues. And I have made some big headway.
Then I decided, the longer I take a hiatus from dating, the harder it will be to get back on the horse, enter the scene. So, here I go again! Grab the saddle, and climb back on. If not now, then when? I know what I want. I have learned something from each date I've been on. This last one left a lasting impression with me. I won't say I feel it or sense it, because I don't know what's coming around the corner. I will say I have a weird feeling that comes and goes that I will hear from this man again. I believe God and Cupid are somehow conspiring on something.
Even if I am ready, or think I'm ready, unexpected surprises are sure to be part of the plan. There are days when I again relive the times that were shared, the conversations, everything shared. Then I have days when I feel like I am on fire! Like I want to Woman Up (in the words of Meghan Trainer). This time, I ask myself questions: What am I willing to handle? What am I willing to invest? ...and then Must I follow those dreaded rules?
I have always had an idea of what my ideal relationship would be like. And not dredge up the past again, but the last one was a pretty good match....while it lasted. I realized the clearer I am with myself, the easier it will be to spot. I once thought I knew what my ideal partner would be, but I am revisiting my vision and tweaking it a bit. To be honest, I need to tweak how I react, respond, and act when things come up.
One thing I've been told over and over is I need to fall in love with myself first. That is something I'm working on. I need to realize how awesome I am already and don't "need" a relationship but instead desire one. I've also gone back to my routine for myself and have been much happier.
So although I haven't fully climbed back on, I am preparing myself. I have to remember these things: I am braver and more courageous by putting myself out there....that alone is a victory. The more practice I get, the better dater I will be. If I don't try, I'll never know what's out there!
A break-up or the end of dates with a guy can hurt like the burning of a curling iron. At first, the pain can be really intense. It doesn't really go away without some sort of treatment. When it happened for me, I let myself have a good cry. I cried on the way home from my work out. I cried once I got home. I thought that crying was the so called protocol for something like this. I let myself have 2-3 days to wallow and relive the moments we had. Then I dried my eyes and took control of the situation. I somehow felt empowered with the fact I made the choice to take my life back and have "me" time. Instead of dwelling on what could have been.
Since this blog is about my dating obstacles, and adventures, and being honest with those obstacles, it's been a bit awkward. Awkward entering the dating scene, and sometimes uncomfortable. The whole idea of dating can be daunting to say the least. The first time out of the gate is never really pretty. It may start out strong and exciting and all. I know I was giddy and excited each time I had a "first date." Then reality sets in and it becomes exhausting. Sleep is lost, games are played with the mind, etc. When this happens, first thing expected to do is throw in the towel. I know....I've said it way too many times. I told myself, "I was fine before all this mess. I was doing fine before this dating nonsense."
I thought about taking a break and taking a "man-cation" or hiatus from dating. I felt like I was getting burnt out and doubting my own awesomeness, so the best thing to do was eliminate dating. Take time and take care of me. Resolve some personal issues. And I have made some big headway.
Then I decided, the longer I take a hiatus from dating, the harder it will be to get back on the horse, enter the scene. So, here I go again! Grab the saddle, and climb back on. If not now, then when? I know what I want. I have learned something from each date I've been on. This last one left a lasting impression with me. I won't say I feel it or sense it, because I don't know what's coming around the corner. I will say I have a weird feeling that comes and goes that I will hear from this man again. I believe God and Cupid are somehow conspiring on something.
Even if I am ready, or think I'm ready, unexpected surprises are sure to be part of the plan. There are days when I again relive the times that were shared, the conversations, everything shared. Then I have days when I feel like I am on fire! Like I want to Woman Up (in the words of Meghan Trainer). This time, I ask myself questions: What am I willing to handle? What am I willing to invest? ...and then Must I follow those dreaded rules?
I have always had an idea of what my ideal relationship would be like. And not dredge up the past again, but the last one was a pretty good match....while it lasted. I realized the clearer I am with myself, the easier it will be to spot. I once thought I knew what my ideal partner would be, but I am revisiting my vision and tweaking it a bit. To be honest, I need to tweak how I react, respond, and act when things come up.
One thing I've been told over and over is I need to fall in love with myself first. That is something I'm working on. I need to realize how awesome I am already and don't "need" a relationship but instead desire one. I've also gone back to my routine for myself and have been much happier.
So although I haven't fully climbed back on, I am preparing myself. I have to remember these things: I am braver and more courageous by putting myself out there....that alone is a victory. The more practice I get, the better dater I will be. If I don't try, I'll never know what's out there!